In our society, women are finally learning to celebrate their postpartum bodies. All over Instagram, Moms share stretch marks and saggy skin with pride. The movement is powerful, encouraging new Moms with postpartum depression to love what they see in the mirror, instead of cringing with disgust. Sadly our celebration of a women’s postpartum body is also creating a body shaming movement that needs to end.
Women, especially Moms, should never be afraid to address their feelings of insecurities.
I’ve been scared to reveal my insecurities with my own postpartum body due to my experiences with body shaming. I can’t recall the first time I heard a snarky comment from someone after having my first child. It’s happened so many times I lost track, not just from strangers, but friends and family too.
I’ve heard it all: “You’re too thin.” “Did you even have a baby?” “Who was the surrogate?” “Are you eating enough?” “You should eat more.” While women who have extra weight after a baby are body shamed is common, it’s important to recognize women with the opposite problem are body shamed too.
The unsolicited comments about my weight loss after pregnancy (which was a result of breastfeeding) changed me.
I learned to be the first to make a remark about my body in new environments to avoid feeling uncomfortable. I joke about my daughters stealing my womanly curves for themselves or liken myself to having the swimsuit body of a little boy. All of the body shaming I’ve experienced has made me even more aware of how much I’ve changed since having children.
My skin has thinned and stretched all over my body with age and multiple pregnancies. I see veins I never knew existed, can fit a quarter in my belly button, and find long hairs growing where they don’t belong. My postpartum body isn’t ideal nor is it perfect. BUT, I haven’t stepped on a scale in months and I don’t obsessively visit the gym. I’m not entirely unhappy with what I see when I look in the mirror.
Let me ask all you Moms a question: “Do you really love your body?” I think I am learning how to love mine. I used to despise my body before I had children, but I know I should appreciate every inch with the utmost respect. My body carried two beautiful little babies safely for nine months and helped me bring them into this world. For the sake of my daughters, I want them to know I’m comfortable in the skin I’m in. So what if my stomach isn’t perfect, my boobs have disappeared and my butt is flat. Isn’t that what motherhood is all about? Learning to love the imperfections?
I have had a similar experience, body wise. Without trying, I’m pretty much at what was my goal weight before I had a baby. I have no idea what happened or how I got this way. I’m sure breastfeeding and now chasing around a toddler helped. I haven’t had too many people make comments about it but it definitely isn’t something I feel comfortable talking about because I worry it would come off wrong or braggy. But I have some of the same issues too – mostly the veins! No one talks about the veins! My husband actually pointed to my leg the other day and said, “ouch, did you run into something?” and I was like, nope, that’s just a bunch of spider veins so it’s just how my leg looks now. Oh well.
Loved reading this! I am 6 weeks postpartum and breastfeeding has made me lose my baby weight quickly as well and I am receiving similar comments! I am eating all of the time and my face is still “thin”. Even though my clothes may fit, my body is still very different and I feel bad even bringing it up when I know so many struggle to lose weight. I think my curves may have been stolen too ?
I get comments like that, “Have you lost more weight?” or “There’s no way you had a baby.” Which can be flattering, but they also don’t see the stretched out, wrinkly belly skin that I have to tuck into my waistband when I sit down. I’m trying to love this body, but it’s hard!
So proud of you for sharing this. You are a true inspiration and absolutely beautiful! You go girl.
xo
Cathclaire
http://www.cathclaire.com
Fashion + Lifestyle Blog
Self love and acceptance is something women have to work towards at every stage of their life. I am not a mom but I can understand where you are coming from. Appreciate your candidness in this post.
❥ tanvii.com
So well said, and I think that issue is alive not just for post-partum bodies, but bodies in general. It seems if you are considered “too thin” you will hear about it, just as much as if you are considered “too big”. It’s so important to stop letting any criticism get to you and to learn to love your body for what it is.
No matter what point in life you find yourself in, it can be hard to love our bodies and feel like we are fitting in with the impossible standards of society. Our bodies can do amazing things, and are always deserving of our love.
Chic on the Cheap
LOVE this, thanks for sharing! x
I totally agree with this and I think we as women and mothers should be caring, considerate, and conscious of the comments we make! All about support and encouragement!
Kileen
cute & little
Thank you so much for sharing your journey. It is so important for everyone to know it will be ok.
Loved reading your post, such an interesting and important viewpoint! Thank you for being open and vulnerable.
Thank you girl for sharing this! Although for me it’s the opposite I struggle to lose weight. We all have our own challenges and no one should make us feel inferior.
A woman’s body can do amazing things and should never be shamed for how it looks! You’re doing great by sharing this and I hope many mom’s gain some confidence from reading it!
-Morgan
How 2 Wear It [] http://how2wearit.com
You are AHMAZING. I absolutely love this post! SO proud of you!
This was a great post. I can identify, as a mom of two, I can say that loosing the weight can be hard. Even after years, my body is not the same but I am learning to love my body – as hard as it can be.
Xx, Nailil
thirtyminusone.com
YES! Struggle with this as well. I feel so skinny and can’t keep weight on due to breastfeeding. And the comments are getting old!